PostSecret: Fat And Pretend I’m Fine
This postcard from PostSecret showed up a couple of weeks ago.
Since I grew up considering myself a fat child, I EXPECT people to make fun of me. In fact, I tend to make fun of myself to head off the insults. It must be difficult growing up skinny and becoming fat later in life. I wonder how it feels to experience that shock as an adult.
PostSecret‘s beneficiary is the National Hopeline Network. It is a 24-hour hotline (1 (800) SUICIDE) for anyone who is thinking about suicide or knows someone who is considering it.
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September 4th, 2008 at 6:04 am
Boy, I can understand this persons feelings. First, I found your blog off of Runner+ Starling Fitness Challenge. At one time I could barely walk because of morbid obesity (6’0 @ 408#). Even though I knew I was hideously fat, I thought I pulled it off well in front of friends and family. It never occurred to me that they thought of me as fat. It was not until I lost 175#,when I realized how people are different around the fats and non fats. I am by no means a “skinny” man, although I am close to half the man I was. People that used to ignore me, now have conversations with me, call me by name and/or smile at me when I walk in the room. I see it now as shallow behavior. I am still the same person I was before, just thinner. Their behavior towards me has made me look hard at the way I treat others, especially people that are heavy or obese. I share a sympathetic understanding for those of us that are challenged in special ways that so called “normies” will never understand. I can hear the food in the fridge calling my name and I know that it is patient, cunning and baffling. It will find a way to undermine my success if I let it. I can not allow others predetermined “misunderstanding” of my current looks determine how I feel and struggle with myself every moment of the day. Just because I have lost a ton of weight, does not make me hip, slick and cool. I’m still the nut case I was before, just skinnier and aware that there are a lot of McD’s, Wendy’s and Pizza Huts along the road of life. Fortunately, I have found an equal number of parks, trails and other activities that give me the freedom to beat the odds.
Physical weight loss is an outside job. Exercising the body and the mind is an inside job. Where the roads connect is where I want to be!
You have a great site. I have added it to my watch list and am looking forward to joining your Fitness challenges on Runner+.
September 4th, 2008 at 8:49 am
Welcome to Starling Fitness, Brian!
You’re right! It takes constant vigilance to keep the weight off. Good job on your weight loss and I’m excited to see you kick my butt on the Runner+ Challenges!
Laura