Bingeing
Twenty pounds since March. That’s how much weight I’ve gained because of my struggles with bingeing. I’ve been eating healthy for almost five days now. It took me a while to realize what my problem was, but I think I finally cracked it.
I thought that I was just lonely after SXSW, but really I was feeling jealous of all the girls who were more successful than I am.
How many times do I need to tell myself that it’s not a competition? Life is about living, not about “beating” someone else.
Five days is the longest I’ve gone eating healthy since March. I know they say that you are never cured of your eating disorder, you just manage it. I don’t want to believe it. I want to believe that that was the last time I ever have to fight that demon, but the damn thing keeps coming back.
Twenty pounds… I feel like I’m starting all over from scratch.
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June 25th, 2006 at 4:00 pm
Hey, I’m right there with you! Twenty pounds gained in the past few months. Bingeing is my problem too.
I’ve been eating healthy for a couple of weeks now too, and exercising a lot. I started using HyperStrike, which is a fascinating virtual personal trainer. It has helped keep me motivated (for now). ๐
June 25th, 2006 at 4:28 pm
Oh my gosh- I so feel for you. And I want to apologize…you spend so much time and energy taking care of all of us out here in cyberland- writing every day, listing amazing links and products… I guess it never occured to me that YOU might need boosts and encoragement,too. I feel badly that I’ve been reading your posts daily for a long time but almost never posted a comment. You’ve been such a help to me- because of you I started WW Core and I’m losing weight for the first time in years and feel great…but, as always, I’m hanging on by my fingernails. You’re one of my lifelines and I can’t thank you enough. I’m glad you’ve fought off the binge demons and I’m cheering for you. Thanks again and all the best to you.
June 26th, 2006 at 4:39 am
Yours is one of my “must-read” sites. Every day. Thanks for your inspiration. I began the WW points plan almost 4 weeks ago. Your site helps keep me going. I understand the binging thing. I can pack on the pounds quicker than quick. I’ll put you on my prayer list. Thanks again.
June 26th, 2006 at 5:57 am
I know my demon well: My overeating/binges satisfies me, numbs me, and allows me to avoid my emotions (temporarily). I eat so that I do not have to face what is bothering me internally.
I dropped 112 pounds not because I dealt with my emotional eating/binges, but I loss because I learned to enjoy exercising and jogging.
However, I am aware that permanent weight loss is impossible unless my emotional eating (using food for comfort or to cope with life) is under control.
I am aware that my mental process of handling anxiety is warped and that I must relearn the correct way of handling anxiety instead of covering it with food.
I can now put my cake down more days than I pick it up, this is what I call managing my eating disorder. I am learning to manage it better daily as I continually learn and put into action: “Problem solving starts without food.”
Laura, I have no doubt that you know your demon as well as I know mine and that when it returns, which it will, that you will be ready to play ball. We all wish you the best.
June 26th, 2006 at 10:33 am
You can do this. One baby step at a time. You’ve inspired me so much. Thank you for sharing your struggles.
I went on a massive binge last night, and I almost felt all was lost. I lost 20 pounds earlier in the year only to put 10 of it back on after my Great-Grandfather’s funeral in March. I’ve lost 7 of the 10 that I regained. Those last 3 keep coming and going. I felt like just staying fat. Who cares if I’m almost 300 pounds?
Then I read this. I consider you a great success, and you have a hard time! I think alot of our eating problems stem from being too hard on ourselves and not loving who we are. I see you, someone who is a great role model for me, having the same struggles. You are human, and I’m human. My sympathy for you makes me sympathetic to myself. I won’t give up. And I know you won’t either.
You can do this, Laura. One step and one bite at a time. You can do this. And so can I!
June 26th, 2006 at 10:46 am
Amanda,
Thanks so much for the comment. I feel so unworthy to be a role model, so let’s just be friends and get through this together. When I started, I weighed 235 pounds and I was well on my way to 300.
It’s hard now, but the breaking point happens to me at 175 instead of 235 now. I just have to look at that as progress. You can do this. We can do it together.
Thanks again, Laura
June 27th, 2006 at 3:30 am
First visit to this site; reading the posts on bingeing. Any backsliders out there? I had lost almost 60 pounds, and needed to lose about 20 more, but 20 have crept back on instead. Can’t seem to get back on track. And I know how you feel, Laura. I own a fitness franchise, and feel terrible about the example I’m setting.
I see this over and over and over again with my members, too. Backsliding sucks; why does it happen and how can we prevent it?
June 28th, 2006 at 10:12 am
I am prone to binge eat myself. It doesn’t mean you failed when your not OP just that what tour doing is not working for you at the time.
June 30th, 2007 at 3:05 pm
I have gained these 20 pounds more times than I can count…all because of bingeing. the past two weeks i was doing really well, didn’t binge and lost a good 6 pounds.. Within the past 4 days I have gained it all back and have become so unhappy and depressed because I don’t think I can ever overcome this. I don’t know what else to do. I don’t want to feel this way, so scared of when i’ll binge next, when I’m trying so hard to do well..